The Rules of “Thoughtful Engagement” on Social Media

Ever feel like you’re showing up online, doing “all the right things,” but still being totally ignored?

You’re liking posts, even sharing articles here and there. But somehow… crickets.

That might be because you’re not really engaging.

Think about this for a minute:

Most of the people in your life (friends, family, colleagues, clients, prospects) are creating content because they care about something. 

Maybe it’s their business. 

Maybe it’s a cause. 

Maybe it’s their grandkid’s science fair volcano.

They’re putting themselves out there, and when you engage thoughtfully, you show up for them.

This kind of support and engagement helps you build deeper relationships, stay top of mind with people who matter, and become someone people actually remember. But it’s not just about being nice (though that’s a bonus). Thoughtful engagement is a strategic visibility habit that can grow your business.

In fact, sometimes engaging with other people's content is even more effective than creating your own.

Plus, consider that each time you engage with someone’s content, what do they get? A notification. So if you engage the right way, you’ll start to stand out. 

What does thoughtful engagement actually look like?

Let’s talk about your three tools:

1. The Like: The Digital Head Nod

A “Like” is the bare minimum. It’s polite, and it’s better than nothing. But if all you ever do is like posts, don’t expect to stand out.

Think of it like nodding at someone across the room but never walking over to say hello. It’s safe. It’s easy. And it won’t get you remembered.

2. The Comment: This Is Where the Magic Happens

This is the secret weapon, but beware: lazy comments kill opportunity. 

“Love this.” 

“Great share.” 

“Thanks for posting.”

These aren’t comments, guys. They’re digital filler at best. They say nothing, mean nothing, and do nothing for anyone, especially you. And, you have to be really careful these days because all the platforms are integrating AI to make commenting fast & easy with these types of conversation-killing phrases. 

You can still say things like, "Love this!," and "Thanks for posting," but if you want to be seen as someone valuable, take 60 seconds to add a sentence with some depth:

“This reminded me of a recent signing I had where a family nearly forgot to include their family trust. Grateful for reminders like this.”

“That last line hit me. I’ve struggled to say no to the wrong clients too.”

“Loved the part about naming alternates. I’ve seen so many families stuck because they didn’t do this.”

When you add your voice, you contribute to the conversation. You leave a door open to continue the conversation within the feed. You spark connection. You become memorable, not just to the original content creator, but to everyone who reads it. 

3. The Share: Only If You Mean It

Please don’t just share posts blindly. You know the type (we all do it), where you just click “Share” and post some random article or content to your feed.

That’s a missed opportunity, and your audience is left wondering why this random post just popped into their feed. Did you get hacked? Are you okay? Why should we look at this? Blind-sharing rarely works. It’s pointless. 

Here’s how to share with impact:

“This article on pet trusts had me snorting coffee. But seriously, if you work in estate planning or have pets, you need to read this.”

“Just had a conversation about this exact topic with a client. This post lays it out clearly. Worth the read.”

Bring context. Show people why it matters. Share your take, not just the link.

Spend the Extra Seconds to Do It Right

We live in a noisy world. If you want to build a business that thrives on relationships, you’ve got to show up like you mean it.

Liking is passive and unmemorable.

Commenting is powerful.

Sharing is strategic.

Thoughtful engagement doesn’t take much time, but it makes all the difference. It turns cold contacts into warm conversations. And it reminds the people in your network that you’re paying attention.

And in business (and in life) that’s the kind of notary people want to hire, refer, and trust.

Put thoughtful engagement into practice now. Tell me what you think about this article and this strategy.

And...

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